Big Data Cares About Me. Really.


This was the iPhone screen that greeted me when I woke up this morning.

And, although I have a healthy respect for the random, I can’t ditch the thought that perhaps — in this age of surveillance — the datasphere somehow took my emotional temperature and decided to reach out through the sea of kilobytes.

Clearly, some database with a record of my Facebook postings and Tweets has somehow reached the conclusion that I’ve been too hard on myself lately.

So thank you, big data. I’m going to take your advice seriously and ease up; maybe throw back some carnitas doused in salsa verde while Tigres del Norte tunes play in the background. Hey, maybe I’ll even wash it down with some Jarritos.

Because, as Stuart Smalley (now Senator Al Franken D-Minnesota) once said on Saturday Night Live:

“I deserve it! Because I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and people like me!”

Yes, Steve, I’ll be your friend.

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